I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize
