watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
