yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Randomize
