I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
