Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
