i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
