thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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