sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
