I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
