that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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