Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
