she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
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