Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Please, let me fuck your mom
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
