I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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