Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
