Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
