Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
