He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
