Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
