am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Randomize
