forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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