Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
