dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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