I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
