So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I AM VODKA MAN
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize