what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
You are the jesus of drinking
Bring me that man meat
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Randomize
