i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
