yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
