I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
