Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Randomize
