I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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