Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
