Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
