Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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