i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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