terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
