I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
