Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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