Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
