I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
