we have officially lost it.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
