Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
