the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
