Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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