Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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