My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
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