I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
you never un-have a 4some
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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