Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize