I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize