It's Friday. Sex?
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
and you fell through a lawn chair
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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