May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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